That stubborn shoulder that keeps flaring up.
Those recurring headaches that are driving you nuts.
That lower back that always feels tight.
That knee that no longer cooperates, forcing you to give up the activities you once loved.
We all know it, that one place in the body that keeps asking for our attention.

From a young age, we’re taught that pain is something to avoid or eliminate as quickly as possible.
We take a painkiller, distract ourselves, or try to “not think about it.” But what if pain isn’t your enemy, what if it’s a signal from your body, a way of saying: “Will you please listen?”

Pain is your body’s way of communicating that something needs your attention. Our bodies are constantly in conversation with us, through tension, fatigue, restlessness. When we ignore those signals, the body simply speaks louder, often through pain. Not to punish us, but to wake us up: “Something here needs your awareness.”

For years, I struggle with (lower) back pain myself. At first, I brushed it off as something that “runs in the family”, a weak back. My mother and brother both have chronic back problems, so it felt inevitable. At first, I ignored it. Then, when it became impossible to ignore, I took painkillers.
When that no longer felt right, I went to physiotherapy, did exercises, I got an MRI scan done and even stopped practicing capoeira because the pain took away the joy. But no matter what I did, the pain followed me — it even grew worse over time, spreading into my mid-back, upper back, and neck.

We all want pain to stop, that’s only human. But when we focus solely on getting rid of the sensation, we miss the message underneath it. We lose the opportunity to understand why the body is holding on to tension, what it’s trying to protect, and where something in our way of living or moving is no longer in alignment.

In a Grinberg Method session, we learn how to stop fighting pain and observe it. We learn to listen instead of resist. We bring awareness to the area that hurts and explore:

• When do I feel the pain most strongly?
• What happens in my body as I focus on it and the situation around it?
• What emotions arise when I give it my full attention?
• Can I allow myself to simply feel it and relax into it without resisting or fighting it?

When we approach pain this way, it begins to shift. It stops being an enemy and becomes a guide.
Often, that’s when we start to feel more open, relaxed, and clear — not because the pain magically disappears, but because we finally understand it with both mind and body.

When I truly started listening to my back pain, I discovered how much it had to tell me. Beneath that constant tension and pain were layers of suppressed anger, shame, frustration, and deep sadness from my past. At work, I kept pushing myself and constantly crossed my own boundaries. I had learned that what I did was never good enough, that I had to prove my worth to be seen and valued. So I took fewer breaks, worked too long, forgot to eat or drink. My belly and diaphragm were always tight, as if simply using willpower could stop me from feeling things or from losing control of my emotions. Being so focused on performing and enduring, I gradually lost connection with the lower part of my body and overused my upper body.

Through these insights — and through teaching my body to respond differently — I’ve learned to make other choices. Now, I pay attention to relaxing my belly and shoulders, breathing deeper, not collapsing in my lower back and taking a pause or longer break whenever tension or pain arises. By allowing emotions instead of suppressing them, the tension and the pain has eased noticeably. I’ve learned that when you become aware of what you do in your body and learn to respond differently, pain no longer has to stay. It can soften and eventually, it can go.

There’s often much more behind pain than we initially realize. When we truly listen to it, we discover that pain is rarely just physical. It can point to old fears, unprocessed emotions, or patterns that no longer serve us. By giving it attention, we gain access to deeper layers of ourselves and that’s where real change begins.